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Writer's pictureLaura Macdougall

Clarifying goals is sometimes the hardest part


This might help....

So many people are goal driven and they have a clear sense they want to move forward and yet may be unclear as to their goal or the next step. Or they may think it is one thing but it is really another.

Recently, working with Sue* (not her real name) I saw first hand how powerful questions help people uncover and clarify what is important to them. Sue and I were practicing coaching techniques on each other. She first identified her goal in coaching to generate some ideas she could implement in her new job to bring more balance to her life. She described how in previous roles, she had been extremely goal driven and hard working and this type A-side of her meant that she had been working to the point of exhaustion and compromising her health and well being. As she described how she wanted more balance in her life, I asked about her values. When we started talking about her values, she identified that perhaps her goal wasn’t so much about balance at work but how to find balance between what was important to her (having a family) and her work goals. So the goal shifted to how can I have a family and also have a career? In other words, how can I find the balance between family and career? As I reframed her goal, and reflected it back to her, I saw a visible shift in her body – she sat up straighter and looked clearer and brighter. There was more energy in her voice and a greater sense of aliveness came over her. She made a connection that wasn’t previously obvious as she realized the question was much bigger than she had originally thought. Sue went on to identify the steps she could take to better understand what timing was right for her to start a family and some specific action steps she could take to clarify how to maintain balance once she had kids.

After the session, Sue and I have had a few opportunities to connect and she said “I thought it was interesting, how, at the beginning of the coaching session, I thought that I had no real “issue”. When asked what aspect of the conversation had been most impactful, she said “The most powerful question was when you asked me about my values. It was only then that I went back to my core value of family and made the connection that this was the larger issue that I had been putting off addressing.”

This is one of the things I love about coaching. Sometimes we think the reason we are going for coaching is one thing but it ends up being something else. Something that is sitting below the surface of our awareness but something that is really important and yet we just don’t know it.

Coaching is a great way to get clarity on where you want to go and the next steps. If you are interested in a free, no-obligation “discovery” session with me to see if coaching is a good fit for you, reach out and connect. I can’t wait to see the energy in you as you make progress towards what is important to you.

*Sue is not her real name and is used to protect her privacy. She has reviewed and approved this post.

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